When we are carrying the burden of our unprocessed pain, sooner or later it will inconvenience us. Many of us are going through our lives aware that there is a pool of pain underlying our daily emotions that we've felt for so long we honestly aren't even sure where it comes from. It almost … Continue reading
...The core of who we are remains the same. All my life I kind of just went with the flow of life, somewhere along the line though I started fighting the changes and ups and downs of my life. I thought I could change outcomes and somehow change whatever anyone saw when they saw me. … Continue reading We all change throughout life…
This is NOT my writing, I am sharing it simply because with everything going on, it hit my heart in a way that I can't explain. Click Here for the original blogger. Yes there is fear. Yes there is isolation. Yes there is panic buying. Yes there is sickness. Yes there is even death. But, They … Continue reading Lockdown
There’s a question I have been pondering recently. What happens when we own everything we are? By ‘owning’, I mean speaking up about the pieces of ourselves that make us unique. It does no harm when speaking about the pieces of ourselves that we are proud of but by doing so only inflates our own … Continue reading The lost side of my story
As if getting sober isn’t hard enough, I pretty much have to re-learn how to do anything and everything. While using alcohol, drugs or other destructive behaviors I had been numbing my emotions for years. I don’t know about anyone else but when I was drinking, relationships were most definitely not my strong suit; in … Continue reading Learning to love me
What happens when you let the person in the mirror down..
For those who don’t know, I work two jobs, my Monday to Friday day job that is my career path. Then, a couple nights a week I manage and bartend at a local family sports restaurant; yes an alcoholic bartender, what a concept. Well, this is where a special saying comes in to play, after … Continue reading Bicentennial
The definition of sobriety is fixed for those who cannot control or have a healthy relationship with alcohol. Staying sober is more than just not using a substance. It involves living a healthy and productive life. It’s not about just dropping the bottle, it’s picking up those pieces and putting yourself and your life back … Continue reading 6 Months
Growth is actually contagious, so if you want to reach your goals, you’ve got to get around people who are going in the same direction you want to be going, and you will catch the success.” —Dr. Henry Cloud Someone in my meetings had said "by getting sober WE changed the rules". I have … Continue reading Surround yourself with people who get it.
This weekend has taught me one thing, I’m no longer the life of the party but that’s okay with me. I am going to own this “new life” of mine. My life has gotten quiet, it’s the Holiday season and I had not one but two holiday parties to attend. The first party, a woman … Continue reading ‘Tis the Season
4 months ago today I took my life back. By now most everyone knows that I am sober and for the most part it’s past the point of people congratulating me, trying to tell me “oh you didn’t have a problem” or privately asking me “don’t you miss drinking?” It almost seems like the buzz of … Continue reading 4 Months…
I read in a news article yesterday that two researchers Esko Lyytinen and Peter Jenniskens predicted the storm could produce anywhere between 400 to 1,000 meteors in the night sky. Data showed the peak of the storm would be around 11:50 p.m. but meteors could have been seen as early as 11:15 p.m. … Continue reading Alpha Monocerotids Meteor Stream
I wanted to make a post about some of the things I’ve noticed and learned in the past 100 days. I don’t need to be drunk to misplace things or be forgetful. I always summed it up to my drinking but surprisingly it turns out that side of my personality is just that, … Continue reading 100 Days
What's yours, will find you.
At 29 years old, I have personally asked myself the million-dollar question a handful of times "do I have a drinking problem?" I look inside myself, I am my toughest critic and I used to ask this question all of the time. I wondered if alcohol was holding me back, I couldn't figure out … Continue reading Alcohol is S#*T
I realized I hadn't done a well enough job at this transition between the old blog and the new one. So I figured no better time than now to give you all some background and explain why I started blogging just over a year ago and why it's changed recently. First and foremost, I do … Continue reading 50 Shades of Please Be Gay
We are more likely to meet people who share our values and goals when we maintain a positive and outgoing attitude in the presence of individuals we do not yet know. As someone who is "starting over" per say; it's vital that I surround myself with people who want to make themselves better, people who … Continue reading You can’t do EPIC shit with BASIC people.
Today is Day 50. It seems crazy to think that I made it 50 days without picking up an alcoholic drink. I can't even begin to describe how big my obsession to drink was and still is some days. I decided to keep some notes of things that I've learned that way I can look … Continue reading Five-Oh
They always say fall in love with your best friend - but what if you fall truly in love though? I am guilty of this a handful of times, I have done it as long as I can remember; it also hurts a lot differently as a lesbian or gay man - you ultimately … Continue reading Always wanting what we can’t have
One of the first girls to catch my attention in High school definitely made me realize my feelings started blossoming. I was beginning to realize I was attracted to several girls and this whole new world, if you will.. Opened up my mind and my life. I had my first girl kiss the summer going … Continue reading Mary
I am not one who usually looks too deep into dreams or anything like that, so this will sound crazy This one dream has been haunting me, I had a crazy dream about three years ago... I was vacationing with a girl I was clearly with. I could see everything so vividly, her long wavy … Continue reading #FindingElizabeth
Sobriety is kind of like the fast-pass line at Disney World, except the ride is simply growing up. Your friends may not be rocked by the not drinking thing, it’s possible that if they aren’t engaging in their own path of self-discovery, there may be tension at some point while you figure yourself out, grow … Continue reading Evolving
My feelings seem to be all over the place - One minute I am on top of the world, unbeatable and invincible. The next minute, I am struggling, psychically drained and questioning if a sober life is worth this pain and chaos. If I ever had a long day at work or felt as if … Continue reading Emotional Rollercoaster
Two weeks sober and I had someone tell me I looked healthier and happier, while yes I was still having internal war-fare in my own mind; truth was I was in fact happier. I did in fact feel good too. Things I couldn't get the hang of in my new role (promotion) at work, I … Continue reading “You look healthier”
- I turned 29 this past July, my birthday party was a huge success - My best friend threw a huge surprise party with a giant water slide bounce house (yes, I had a giant bounce house at my 29th birthday; don't judge.) It was one of the few things that suited me, … Continue reading Outgrowing my own B.S.